Monday, July 23, 2007

Late On Purpose By Accident

1:21 p.m. / 13:21

It takes a special talent to be late on purpose by accident. This morning I got confused, but I didn't know I was confused and I didn't figure it out until it was too late to save myself. I took my shower in record time and was pleased to see that even though I got in the shower late, I had more time than usual to finish getting ready for work. It wasn't quite 8:00 yet and I didn't need to leave until 8:20. Or so I thought. For some reason. So, I dried my hair and got dressed and still had almost 15 minutes until I really had to leave so while it did cross my mind to go ahead and leave anyway, I figured, hey, this doesn't exactly happen every day and should enjoy it.

I set an alarm for 8:19 to remind me to leave when I needed to, and went the computer to check my e-mail. After that, the alarm still hadn't gone off and I managed to read a paragraph of my book before it finally sounded and I shoved the phone into my purse and made for the door. Once in the car, I kept looking at the clock. Something wasn't right. If I left right on time, how come the clock was showing a time by which if I hadn't made it onto the expressway, I was sure to be late, before I even reached the end of my street? Because I wasn't supposed to leave at 20 minutes after 8:00; I was supposed to leave 20 minutes before 8:30. I had left 10 minutes late... on purpose.

I failed to absorb any of what was going in the audiobook I was listening to, so it failed to distract me and calm me down. So, by the time I arrived at work, late by more than 5 minutes, I was nearly in a rage over my strange mix-up that could be blamed on nothing and no one but myself. I was so mad, it was pretty obvious to my co-workers. I could not seem to calm down and when my boss asked me what was wrong, I told her the story. She just laughed... probably because I was screaming like a lunatic. Am I a lunatic? It seems possible sometimes. Actually, I can't help but wonder if I subconsciously worked myself into such a rage because I knew she'd feel more sorry for me for being so upset than mad that I was late. Again. I do that kind of a lot... well, not mixing up the time so I think I'm on time when I'm not, but showing up late in general.

Time to eat lunch now... or crawl in a hole die.

holy crap. This is so fabulous!!! I love you, bibliophile, for your contenuously amuzing ability to be late, even purposefully. :) (I've done shit like that too.. don't worry)
This is so a Bibliophile story. I'm sorry, its just, so YOU! :)
Stupid clocks.
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